2020

My Journey To Breathwork

I was first introduced to breathwork in 2020. I was 39 and in treatment for the 3rd time for my eating disorder and addictions.

Each week a different healing modality was offered—everything from art therapy to yoga to creative writing. About halfway through my 90 day stay, a breathwork journey was divinely placed in my path.

Those 20 minutes transformed me. I felt rooted in my own body like never before and finally gave myself the grace, compassion, and acceptance I deserved. Deemed a chronic case, I went from believing this false narrative to a profound knowing I was going to be okay. And not only okay, but destined to make a change.

I couldn’t save the world, but I could save myself while the world watched.

After the session the facilitator pulled me aside and said, “I usually don’t do this but I feel like you should really continue with this type of healing.”  And so I didn’t.

2022
Fast forward to 2022

I was in recovery, but not really. Yes I had a foundation but there was no evolution. I was talk-therapied out and AA felt like a forced hour of proving I’m doing the work.

This all changed when one of my dearest friends, Lisa, mentioned she was heading to Sedona for a breathwork training.

My whole body broke out in goose-bumps and I booked the training and my flight that same week—intuitively knowing I needed a deeper level of healing.

Life was good, but felt stagnant and forced. Kind of like holding a beachball under water, I was going through the motions more often than not.

I remember thinking, “This is it? This is the life I signed up for?” I wasn’t sure how 6 days of breathing (something I did every day, right?) could possibly help, but I felt called.

And thankfully, I listened.

A seeker by nature, I have truly sought out every healing modality known to humanity from EMDR, reiki, hypnosis, yoga, meditation, etc.. I even hired a psychic to find out what the hell was wrong with me.

I would have never guessed my own breath would forever shift my self-image, unearth my deep-seated wounds, and permanently shift my perspective of life in this body. I feel like I healed more in one week using my own breath under than in every healing modality I’ve experienced put together.

This immersive training not only solidified my experience in treatment, but confirmed my purpose and mission:

  • Breathwork is the evolution for not only those in recovery, but the foundation for humanity to heal and find peace within themselves.
  • There is no outside jury. You are your own guru.
  • We’re all just walking each other home.

The Story Behind Sonder

The name of my business is Sonder Breath

Sonder is my favorite word of all time. It simply means the realization each passerby is living a life as complex and intricate as our own.

A month after returning home from my breathwork training, I felt called to book a flight to California to care for one of my favorite cousins who was at the end of his battle with AIDS and stage 4 cancer.

I facilitated several condensed breathwork sessions for him. Witnessing his heart soften and find true peace before he passed solidified my desire to help and guide others using the healing power of breathwork.  There are no words to articulate the heart wrenching yet simultaneously sacred and beautiful experiences we shared before he passed.

A little over two months later, in the summer of 2022, my baby brother was in a near fatal car accident and was not expected to live. Suffering from a horrific traumatic brain injury and having half his skull removed, we were told if he made it past 30 days, he would live, but most likely never be the same.

I spent my entire summer in the ICU with him holding a space I was never before capable of. My own breathwork practice gave me this ability and once again confirmed holding space for others during their most vulnerable and difficult times was a higher calling I couldn’t ignore. The doctors call him a miracle. Today he is almost back to his old self and we are the closest we’ve ever been.

With one experience I helped him pass, in the other I helped him live.

Each experience reminded me of my word—Sonder…..and how we all have so many experiences and stories the world will never know.

These complexities and intricacies connect us if we can allow for them to be seen and someone is there to hold a sacred space for us in our darkest moments.

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